34. Au revoir mémoire

I've got 11,000 photos on my iPhone camera roll and I decided to delete every single one of them today. I thought it would be a great idea to finally clear out all the wasted space on nonsensical pictures. After what seemed like 2 hours, it finally cleared and the sentimental side of me was still clinging on to the memories and I felt like I made a bad decision. 

Long story short, I restarted my phone without backing it up. Slowly, all of the photos started filling up the album... I took a good look once more and relived the memories. It was painful to see so many photos of people whom have left my life, places that I've once been and can never go back or even things that I've once loved to do but can never do again.

Don't live to regret. Being able to look at all these photos to relive it was all by fate. Not many would get the chance to do over what they think is a mistake. Although a surge of emptiness lingers within me right now, at least I've learnt a very, extremely valuable lesson - don't live to regret. 

Don't let matters pass, do it.

Don't let the sun set without resolving, settle it.

Don't let emotions be bottled up, release it.

Don't let the anger be kept within, let go of it.

Don't live only to regret it.

I had the last chance to say a final goodbye.

I'm deleting the photos.

Au revoir mémoire; 

33.

It's so funny how I used to be so dependent on one thing before but immediately after finding out something, I choose to totally distant myself away from it. Goodbye to my memory, goodbye to all that ever was. 

& HELLO 2014! (though it's already 11th January.)

32

There's something weird about dreams and how it captures every fragment of your imagination that even your soberness can't come up with.
Somethings are just meant to coexist but are never meant to meet.

31. Perspective -

See the world through your eyes and see how there's many million things in the world. The colors in the world are so vivid, the lines so defined. You can see everything beautifully, but a speck of a dust may cause all goodness and wholesomeness to be gone. Beauty may come crashing down in just about a second. But to repair perfection takes a lifetime. Legend has it that some people had tried to make life perfect. But everyone died trying. No one can make a difference or even start a revolution. A handful tried and their experiences are testimonies of why we should never try to be indifferent. The world is a huge and cruel and there's not many in the world that actually bothers trying to make it beautiful. To want to make a difference, others call it silly, some call them ambitious.

30.

You don't have to try to be perfect because perfection is already what you are. God had a special plan when He created you. He took a little extra time and a little extra care when it was your turn. He made you so perfect words cannot describe how wonderful and great you really are. 

29.

Ended a case with all his friends.

Knocked off work.

Got out of his pick up to a sacred place,

He tried to find a girl even though he had a girl back home.

She caught his eye.

Every Friday evening worshiping the great.

Asking for forgiveness and maybe a man.

She never knew her prayers would be answered that quickly.

Too quickly.

He caught her eye.

Danced and squandered their youth away.

Dated and had fun everyday.

Tried to get closer and closer each time.

Unfortunately,

too close.

Her mother refused to let her go out.

Asked her to stay at home 

And never to meet the man again.

Her youthful desires sent her away.

She wanted every opportunity to be with him.

She cried about it and she doesn't know how.

She didn't want to be pregnant.

His life was at stake,

Her family could take action,

She was only 18.

A shot gun marriage, 

a quiet affair.

She didn't want the world to know 

her despair.

She quit school, 

she stopped going to where they met.

She loved him, 

and he loved her.

She tried to stay positive

as if everything were alright-

It wasn't

They only barely knew each other.

Fighting and quarreling at home everyday

The typical love story of romeo and juliet.

She was of a shady background 

but he was a man of justice.

She tried every possible way to get closer to him,

Too close it did.

He started to hit.

Abusing her for the next 10 years,

divorce was their constant topic for the next 30 years.

They never got to it.

Out came the first, 

then the second.

The third came soon

and so the fourth was the last.

Many years later, 

the fourth is 16

Third is 24

Second is 33

First is 37.

She's waiting for her results with her kids.

She's gonna be healed.

Definitely.

28.

Something i penned down awhile back. 

Relentlessly continuing the sounds of chitter-chatter, 

The rain all around making it a cool, cool weather, 

The aroma of coffee that doesn't seem to matter, 

people studying blindly and susceptible to the noise. 

Merciless cramming with a pinch of irritation, 

how can this be a conducive place?

Deemed as the study place in Singapore,

yet the ambience is that of a heartlander coffee shop. 

I came here in hopes of having a good, productive day. 

Only to realize 6.60 squandered away. 

I could've bought an eighty cent worth coffee 

for the same ambience, in a loud and noisy 

coffee shop.